Getting married is a huge step and one that many of us take seriously. And by all means, we should! It’s a contract that can determine how our lives will play out, pending all the intricacies that two people becoming one entails. However, many of us put our all into the process of getting married but often fail at maintaining the small yet important elements that are vital to sustaining a happy and successful marriage. Here are 25 things you can do to ensure a happy and lasting marriage:
25 Things Happily Married Couples Do (and You Should Too)
1. Marry the right person. There is no way to know for sure if you are marrying the right person or if the marriage will succeed without giving it a try, but there are always telltale signs during courtship that can help determine if that person will be the right partner for you. Paying close attention to the words, deeds, and actions of the person you think you are falling in love with is absolutely the ultimate key to securing a happy and successful marriage. The saying, âaction speaks louder than wordsâ holds true to the very end. Their words must be in alignment with their actions! If the person you are getting ready to spend the rest of your life with actions are not in line with his or her words do not overlook them and expect them to be in line when you are married. Not taking note of this and making the wrong decision will put your heart, your health, your happiness, and possibly your life in danger.
2. Revere their marriage union and vows. This is the foundation on which all successful marriages are based. Everything else usually falls in place when the marriage is respected by both parties.
3. Treat each other with utmost respect at all times, extending common courtesy â please, thank you, excuse me, youâre welcome. Being married does not give anyone the right to disregard common courtesy when dealing with the other party, and if you are going to be late for heavenâs sake – call!
4. Put each other first. Best friends and families are of course important; however, when two people are married the order of importance changes, as far as relationship goes. Let your partner know and see that in your actions.
5. Respect each otherâs space. Even though you two are married, you are still individuals first. It is essential for every human to spend time with him or herself and find time to maintain the connection with him or herself. When you take time out to breathe and connect with yourself, you become more balanced and better able to give of yourself.
6. Remain open, honest, and faithful to each other.
7. Always willing to share with each other. Happily married couples do not deprive each other of intimacy. They are submissive and understanding.
8. Spend some âjust the two of usâ time – everyday; not necessarily making love, but just holding hands and staring into each otherâs eyes or sometimes sharing laughs and reminiscing about private moments they shared. Share a good bottle of wine while watching the sun set, or take long walks together.
9. Show appreciation. She may not know how to cook like Rachel Ray or Paula Deen, but whenever she makes the effort to prepare your favorite recipe, the least you can do is let her know you appreciate it. Likewise, he may not be the best masseur you have ever encountered, but when he offers to massage your feet or wherever you like to be massaged just let him know how you feel and that you appreciate his effort.
10. Keep the romance alive. Fix your lover breakfast in bed for no special reason. Buy her flowers because well, she deserves it. Take each other on spontaneous dates; do not wait for holidays or special occasions to do so. Surprise each other at regular intervals. Romance fuels relationships; when the romance dies, so does the relationship and eventually, the marriage.
11. Keep the lines of communication open and communicate often. The more you talk to each other, the more you will get to know about each other. The more enlightened you will be to the personâs likes and dislikes which can help you avoid displeasing each other, thus lessening the arguments you two will have.
12. Speak with partner about any grouse they have. Never assume that your partner knows what you are having issues with. And do not hold a grudge thinking that the other party should know what is bothering you. They are not psychic and neither are you!
13. Argue fairly. Yes, even happily married couples argue at times. They stay on topic and listen to what the other party is saying before replying. They do not involve past issues in their present dispute, and most importantly, they do not hit or call each other offensive names. Scars â both physical and mental, are permanent and hard to overlook. Words are powerful! Once they are out they cannot be returned.
14. Embrace each other with a proper goodbye whenever they are departing and a proper hello when they reunite. This simple gesture is very powerful! It is often overlooked by many couples who often times have shouted to the other party from the front door âSee you tonight!â and headed out the door, and upon returning âHi honey, Iâm homeâ and reaching for a beer or the TV remote. Happily married couples take the last few minutes before departing to embrace, make eye contact, and say their goodbyes. This sets the tone for the entire day. Upon returning home, they spend the first few minutes again embracing and saying a proper hello or glad to have you home.
15. Extend loyalty to each other when dealing with family and friends. Happily married couples hold their spouse in high esteem, and lets their family and friends know how much they love and value each other. Their remarks about a spouse when they are not around, is always positive.
16. Always remember and acknowledge each otherâs birthdays, anniversaries, and any other dates that are special to either party.
17. Recognize that their partner is an imperfect being and is ready to forgive them should the need arise, and is quick to apologize when they are wrong. Happily married couples never try to change each other; instead, they compromise and look within.
18. Take time to share in each otherâs successes, and is there to encourage and support each other through failures. Like a crisis, failure will occur at times, but to get through that period you will need to combine forces. Enduring the down times will bring you both out shining with a stronger bond and marriage.
19. Laugh together. Making fun of the silly stuff that happens everyday, will enrich the bond shared and keep the stress quotient very low in the relationship.
20. Have at least one meal together â everyday. Mealtime can be one of the best bonding time. You get to look at each other while satisfying one of the most intimate need of any human being.
21. Make every effort to stay in shape mentally, physically, and emotionally. You want to be able to enjoy your relationship with each other for many years.
22. Make decisions concerning the family â together. The family unit can get very fragile when decisions are made without consulting each other. The other party feels slighted, overlooked, and unimportant especially when it comes to the handling of finances, and dealing with the children.
23. Resolve issues before going to bed or at least amicably agree to disagree. This is one step that can catch a relationship when it is about to fall.
24. Know when to be consistent and when to change course. Happy and successful couples have learned that they have to approach problems differently to get different results. If something is not working in the relationship, it is okay to change or adjust it accordingly. Minor changes in approach, attitude and actions can make the biggest difference in a marriage.
25. Keep abreast of what is going on around them. Happily married couples are aware that the things that are happening in the world around them, affects them either directly or indirectly. They read books, journals, attend seminars, browse web articles and observe other successful couples. They participate and keep a keen eye on the stock market, and constantly look for ways to improve their lives and marriage.
Marriages are failing – left, right, center – everyday but yours don’t have to meet that fate. You don’t have to look back after the fact and regret not giving your marriage your all. Take these 25 tips and implement them to improve your marriage, and take your relationship to the next level up. You’ll be glad you did!
This is one of those books that we revel in here at MBB! And there’s a reason for that. It was borne out of Paulo Coelho asking himself the BIG question, âWhy did it take me so long to fulfill my dream?â. He had just completed something he had wanted to do, and was compelled to put pen to paper and share his experiences with us – in the hope that we will not wait another second to begin following our hearts and realizing our dreams. You have a dream that’s close to your heart or one that has been deferred, or buried, and now is the time to exhume that dream, dust it off, remove it from the shelf and begin the process of bringing it to fruition. You will inevitably face obstacles and obstructions on your journey, but you will develop the requisite stamina and qualities you need to face and pursue your dreams as long as you submit to the authority of your will, that you will see your dreams through to the very end. Make that commitment to yourself and honor it!
The Alchemist is a New York Times bestseller, international bestseller and it is choc full of spiritual and practical gems that can be applied to our everyday life. The journey in the book is much like an initiation, where one is constantly subjected to tests of patience and courage. It will remind you that in pursuing your “Personal Legend” (what you’ve always wanted to accomplish), it is as much about the journey as it is about the destination. Coelho constantly reminds us that we don’t have yesterday or tomorrow; we only have today. It is written in original word version and also an illustrated edition which is excellent for readers who prefer story-telling through images and graphics.
Travel your journey with joy, hope, and challenges in your heart. – Paulo Coelho
The most important thing this book commands is that you strive to accomplish your dreams and allow nothing and no-one to stop you! You must decide whether you’re going to continue with what you’ve been accustomed to – remaining in your comfort zone, or pursuing what you really want and expanding your territory. It is beautifully written with gorgeous illustrations which makes the story shine through in a pellucid way. It is evocative and allusive – working on you without seeming to, and at the end you’re left both satisfied as the adventure concludes and also wanting more, and more importantly – wanting to do more.
In order to live the life you truly desire, you have to let go of inhibiting thoughts and beliefs, be free with your expressions and actions, and follow your heart. You have to do those things you crave so you can have a fulfilling life and one day look back and declare – “I’ve lived”. Your quest to explore and enjoy life may not only bring you tangible wealth, but may also be far different and far more satisfying than you could ever imagine – bringing you abundance of intangible wealth. Life is truly a blessing! Embrace it to its fullest. As Coelho exclaimed in his book interview, “A blessing has no explanation, but needs to be treasured and honored”. Live your life completely, being unapologetically you – in mind, body, and spirit.
Every medium has something else to offer! We go to live plays and shows for that in-person experience. We watch movies for that visual-effect experience. We read books for that in-depth pull-me-in experience that only a book can beget. Movies and plays can only show so much, but a book can encompass substantial amounts of detail and context that surpass all other media. Books help us understand life!
They provoke reactions. They have the ability to change us for better, or change us for worse. We say use them as catalyst for your advancement.
Make it a habit to secure and read books of all genre, background, and intent! You can begin by reading this book – The Alchemist, and continue reading from the books we have curated in our series Transformational Books – Our Picks.
Remember: You too can live “the empowered woman lifestyle”. And you don’t need permission!
One of the most difficult things to cope with, is failure at anything we deem important. It can bring on a deep sense of loss, of self-worth, and many times have us question ourselves – whether or not we are even capable of accomplishing anything worth accomplishing. We cannot immediately see through the hurt and the pain to uncover the reasons why it happened. However, failure is evolutionary â it helps us to grow, mature, and reach deeper understandings about life, what we want, and why we want it. It helps us to become better persons, expanding our minds while deepening our hearts. So as much as failure can hurt very deeply at times, without failure, we couldnât appreciate our successes. It is nature’s way of rebooting our lives while keeping us grounded.
If youâve recently failed at something that you believed in wholeheartedly, all hope isnât lost. Failure is not the end of the road! Whether it was failure in relationships, love, business, finances, career, or anything else, failure isnât the end. In fact, failure is just the beginning. If you can get pass that initial shock, hurt, pain and analyze the entire process, then you will be able to revamp and use the results of your analysis to position you more favorably to succeed.
Yes, sometimes the failure is so huge, you would rather not try anything remotely close again, but the decision you make here to either try again or give up entirely, will be a game-changer for your life. Almost all of us have given up entirely on something after failure, no matter how big or small that failure was – from marriages to careers, and everything in between, something that once meant something to us – after failure, didnât really seem to mean that much at all anymore. But does that mean that if we fail at something we didnât really want it in the first place? Or, is it that the pain of failure forces us to create some dissonance between the old goal and the new post-failure self?
When you have a strong enough deep-rooted reason why you need to succeed, success is not optional – it’s a must! And whenever something is a must the only thing that separates you from that goal is time. So if you have a “must” you need to accomplish, and you have failed at it before, reassess your process leading up to your failure and redesign a new approach to ensure your future success.
One very powerful thing to do in addition to reassessing and redesigning a new process, is to create or recreate an inspirational vision board in your home and pin photos that youâve found depicting your life goal. Place it conspicuously so you can stare at success in front of you as you go throughout your day. See it, feel it, breathe it, and mentally live it until it’s physically real! Reorganize, setup new strategies, and take consistent action towards your goal – everyday. Do what you say you are going to do and eventually you will succeed.
We have chosen and added this book to our transformational picks because it has helped us and our clients in our quest to becoming whole, and we want you to know that it is entirely possible to become whole – if only you acknowledge your need to be whole, and take the necessary action steps to embody your wholeness. Wholeness is available to YOU too! Take action, change your life!
Bruce Alan Kehr, M.D. is a psychiatrist and a psychotherapist, and while this book was written from a perspective of helping people who are already engaged in some type of psychotherapeutic counseling, it houses tons of gems that can benefit us all and help us live a better, more fulfilling life – a wholesome life. With his game-changing, life-saving strategies, Dr. Kehr has helped thousands of women find joy, peace, wholesomeness in their personal, family, and business life. As he said in his own words, “Helping others brings me enormous joy. During my 40 years as a practicing psychiatrist it has been my honor to help thousands of patients ease emotional pain, end aloneness, and find self-love”…”If you suffer from emotional pain that just won’t go away, feel alone at work or at home, suffer from low self-esteem, or endure challenging love relations, read my blogs and my book. I wrote them for you, to bring you hope.” Our team here at MBB can attest to that!
Dr. Kehr’s Book is Geared Towards:
1. Anyone suffering from emotional distress that just wonât go away.
2. Patients in psychotherapy who are not getting better.
3. Psychotherapists who would like to better understand the underlying biological basis of the symptoms experienced by their clients.
4. Patients in treatment with a psychiatrist who have not fully recovered.
In this book you will find provocative lessons, actionable plans, and real-life case studies that make clear what we must do everyday to ensure we embody wholesomeness. There is a section devoted to romantic relationships and emotional intimacy which is superbly written and expounded on, and many of us here have found it very useful and we are sure some of you will too. There is also a section about children growing up and leaving the home – empty nesting, and how you can be prepared to let go. Very valuable insights! There are stories of people in treatment which is very helpful in understanding and accepting that the problems we all face are universal, and that there is always hope, no matter how our circumstances can make us feel.
This book will help you get past emotional struggles and get unstuck so you can begin attracting all the good things you envision for your life.
Many of the problems we are facing in our world today are due to two things: 1) lack of empathy, and 2) selfishness. We all know what selfishness is, but what is empathy? It is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, and experience their circumstance in that moment. Appreciating anything requires empathy as well as the ability to think of someone else other than yourself. We can take care of our well-being and still regard others!
Our need to be constantly better than the other – not because we personally desire the things the world perceives as “the best”, but because having those things make us looked on as “living the good life” and getting us the well-envied “attention”. The constant comparison, trying to keep up with the Joneses and the Kardashians, feeling very badly about ourselves when we don’t, which causes us to remain in that constant space of lack and ingratitude. We are continuously sizing up and putting our attention on the people who are getting the attention and seemingly living a wonderful life instead of focusing on what we truly want as individuals and working to bring “that” to fruition, as well as listening to others who are screaming for help – some of whom we may be able to help using our unique gifts and talents. It’s in giving that we receive!
Stephen R. Covey gave us the best advice in his book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. He said we should, “Seek first to understand, then to be understood”. Many of us do the reverse, and this again is due to selfishness and lack of empathy. What does all this have to do with you appreciating your life? If you are only “seeing” the people you are working tirelessly to catch up to or surpass, and not the people who “seemingly” are less fortunate but may be in alignment with the purpose you were put here on this earth to fulfill, you will never live a fulfilling life because you will never be satisfied and will remain unappreciative.
So are you empathetic? And will you begin appreciating your life? If you do the following 5 “Must Do” to start appreciating your life real quick, and find yourself un-phased and still unappreciative, you have no empathy and you need to snap out of this virtual reality and look inwardly at “who you truly are”.
âBy taking the time to stop and appreciate who you are and what youâve achieved â and perhaps learned through a few mistakes, stumbles and losses â you actually can enhance everything about you. Self-acknowledgment and appreciation are what give you the insights and awareness to move forward toward higher goals and accomplishments.â â Jack Canfield
5 Things You “Must Do” To Start Appreciating Your Life Real Quick
Exercise 1. Visit a Homeless Shelter
Take some time and go to a homeless shelter, and immerse yourself into what is taking place there. We would recommend that you literally go and seek shelter as if you are homeless – even for 1 night, but it will not be fair to a real homeless person who will be turned away that night because you have taken the spot they should have gotten, and you don’t really need it. But go and be a part of what is going on. Don’t just go there and be an outsider looking in! Immerse yourself. To make it more real, you can probably volunteer so you can get an inside look and feel. Help to feed the people who canât manage to feed themselves. Look into their eyes and listen to their stories. Theyâve lost it all for one reason or another. Some of them are alone in this world, and others have to care for small children, and itâs utterly heartbreaking to see this.
But again, if you do not possess the ability to be empathetic – putting yourself in their shoes instead of staying on the outside looking in at them going through and totally separating yourself from them and that experience, this exercise will have zero effect on you and your ability to be more appreciative of your life and where you are right now.
Exercise 2. Visit a Food Pantry
We have heard from many of our women around the world how grateful they are for the people who take time out to cater to their needs by opening pantries and seeking out donors to contribute to their efforts so that people do not have to die of hunger, but they also have a common thread, and that is that the foods are mostly barely edible. People who go to pantries do not have a choice! In fact, even our CEO Eugenie Nugent has had her share of relying on pantries while going through a tough time in her life during the recession, and while the pantries she visited in New York City mostly had reasonably good foods, most pantries are filled with “whacky foods” as some of our women term it.
Don’t get us wrong! The owners of those pantries have really good intentions, but the quality of the food they give is most times what they themselves would not eat. Yet, many people who have no other option at a particular time in their life, have no choice but to eat what they receive in order to remain alive while clinging to hope that “this too shall pass”.
Go ahead and visit one of those pantries and eat their food for 1 entire week. No, don’t cheat the people who really need that pantry food; give your grocery money for that week to the pantry coordinator so they can add more foods to the supplies they have. Do not cheat this! You have to be in the moment as if it is really happening to you, and you have no idea when that phase will be over. Again, if you do not have the ability to be empathetic, this exercise will not work for you. Without empathy, you will tell yourself, “It’s happening to ‘them’ not me”.
Exercise 3. Visit Terminally Ill Patients at The Hospital
Whether itâs sick children or sick adults, there are people that are dying right now in hospitals close by you. Some are waiting for a new kidney, liver, heart, and some are laced with incurable diseases that makes them all the more hopeless. Some are constantly in pain, because they have exhausted all pain medications that are available on the market as their body has gotten so used to them from taking them for so long and have become immune to them and thus – ineffective. There are terminally ill children who havenât been given a chance in life. When you look into their eyes and realize that youâve lived such a full life, you feel instantly guilty that you’ve been such an ingrate – that is if you possess the ability to be empathetic and unselfish.
This exercise isnât meant to make you feel guilty for your life; itâs meant to help you appreciate your life and what you have – NOW. Even if youâre not 100% healthy and you’re living with some illness like high blood pressure, high blood sugar, etc. you are alive! And those can be monitored and controlled. Right now, youâre alive.
So, go ahead and visit those people who are currently less fortunate than you are, and are fighting for the simple thing that so many of us take for granted – life.
Exercise 4. Visit a Women Detention Center
See the conditions that those women are existing in and listen to their stories. Many of them have done wrong in their lives to end up there, but many have been done wrong and after retaliating have ended up there. In many countries, the crime rarely fits the time, and people are forced to remain in inhumane conditions for periods not conducive to normal human functioning. You are not there! That does not mean that you couldn’t have been there. Many of us are born into situations that are surefire setups for takedowns, and some have been caught in “wrong place, wrong time” situations. If you have the “freedom” and ability to go about your business and pursue your dreams, you should be very appreciative – even though you are not there yet.
Exercise 5. Visit a Morgue
Yes, there are dead people there. They have no life, and regardless of what they did with their one life chance, they can’t do anything now. Their time is up, but you’re still here. For how long? None of us know, but somewhere in the scriptures it states, “it is appointed unto man to die…” so death is sure! So what are you doing with your life right now? Are you living it to its fullest? Or are you spending it trying to live someone else’s life and yearning after things you think you should have for all the wrong reasons?
If you find yourself being unappreciative, do the above-mentioned 5 things. If none of the above makes you appreciative, take some time away from everything and connect with who you truly are.
We have chosen and added this book to our transformational picks because it has helped us and our clients in our quest for financial prosperity, and we want you to know that financial prosperity is available to you as well â if only you acknowledge that it is, and take the necessary action steps to pull in YOUR six figures. There is enough for YOU too! Change your mindset, change your life!
The number of women making six figures or more is increasing and continues to rise at a rate never seen before. This is cause for celebration! If you’re not already in on this six-figure-women-winning-wealth-building juggernaut, then it’s time to get in formation and align yourself for yours.
Now, let’s set something straight! Six figure women did not just wake up and tada “I’m a six figure chick”! They face some of the same issues and challenges you face, but they held steady and consistent in their quest for success, and allowed nothing and no-one to get in their way – or stay in their way – and alas they ultimately succeed. You don’t get to see the tears, doubts, downfalls, sleepless nights that they experience, but without those down times, making six figures might not have been possible. They didn’t start making six figures overnight! Even the Kim Kardashian had to start somewhere and gradually work her way to the pinnacle she’s at where she can sellout a new-just-launched product within hours of launching it. Ask any six figure woman and she’ll tell you she didn’t start out keeping up with the Joneses and the Kardashians, she prioritized her “must haves” that are in alignment with her goals, channel her resources where they best work for her, so that later she could do whatever she wants – including keeping up with the Joneses and the Kardashians if she so desire.
Barbara outlines the power of understanding the difference between working hard and working smart with practical techniques that will energize and move you to take initiative in changing your mindset and the way you view and deal with money. According to Barbara, “If you continuously earn less than your full potential, you’re a perpetual under-earner”. And the main differences between high earners and the under-earners are actions and attitudes. What this means is that you are caught in what we termed here at MBB – a SPINN Cycle, and you have the power to change your mindset, take action and get in alignment with your worth in order to see your greatest dreams and desires realized. Sometimes we have to do something new! Change course. Keep our eyes and hearts on our goals and dreams, but configure the strategies we use to accomplish them. We cannot keep doing the same thing but expecting different results.
You Can Count On Secrets of Six Figure Women to:
1) Challenge the way you view and treat money
2) Create thought-provoking, mind-shifting aha moments
3) Show you why you too can amass the wealth you so desire and deserve
4) Help you bounce back from self-doubt, procrastination, and self-sabotage
Like many of us here at MBB, this book will help you get on the right path to financial freedom. As long as you follow the concepts and apply them to your individual situation, you will benefit immensely. It is filled with anecdotal evidence and practical steps that can prove very effective when practiced! And as we always recommend here at MBB, read this book all the way through, and do so with an open mind. Not with the mind to make critique, but to absorb what you can from it that is meaningful and geared towards enhancing your life. We all have different writing styles and ways we tell stories, but we all have something valuable to offer. Never discount that!
Read, and reread the chapter on money and begin to transition to your six figures, using those tools. You can have your money work for you! This is what we talk about and help women implement here at MBB through one of our signature programs MASTER Your Finances. But before you can MASTER your finances, you first gotta earn some money in order to have it work for you, and that’s in our signature program WERK Your Money Making Genie.
It was borne out of Paulo Coelho asking himself the BIG question, âWhy did it take me so long to fulfill my dream?â. He had just completed something he had wanted to do, and was compelled to put pen to paper and share his experiences with us – in the hope that we will not wait another second to begin following our hearts and realizing our dreams. You have a dream that’s close to your heart or one that has been deferred, or buried, and now is the time to exhume that dream, dust it off, remove it from the shelf and begin the process of bringing it to fruition. You will inevitably face obstacles and obstructions on your journey, but you will develop the requisite stamina and qualities you need to face and pursue your dreams as long as you submit to the authority of your will, that you will see your dreams through to the very end. Make that commitment to yourself and honor it!
The Alchemist is a New York Times bestseller, international bestseller and it is choc full of spiritual and practical gems that can be applied to our everyday life. The journey in the book is much like an initiation, where one is constantly subjected to tests of patience and courage. It will remind you that in pursuing your “Personal Legend” (what you’ve always wanted to accomplish), it is as much about the journey as it is about the destination. Coelho constantly reminds us that we don’t have yesterday or tomorrow; we only have today. It is written in original word version and also an illustrated edition which is excellent for readers who prefer story-telling through images and graphics.
We have chosen and added this book to our transformational picks because it has helped us and our clients in our quest for financial prosperity, and we want you to know that financial prosperity is available to you as well â if only you acknowledge that it is, and take the necessary action steps to pull in YOUR six figures. There is enough for YOU too! Change your mindset, change your life!
, read it, implement the strategies in your life, and expect to be improved – wholistically.
